Cutting down phone time
I have had a niggling sense for a long time that I should cut down my screen time, and these last two months have been the time I’ve finally acted on it. My screen time was about 5 hours a day, which equated to about 6 days a month I was spending on my phone. And I know only 10% of that was communicating. I’m still on about 2 hours, but it feels much more manageable.
This video pushed me to it, although I didn’t fully follow the steps.
I saw Ahir Shah’s show earlier this year and he said that his wife was happier than him, probably because she didn’t look at a ‘back box of doom’ as soon as she woke up. I am trying that principal too, leaving my phone out of my bedroom, reading before bed and when I wake up. I think it is helping my anxiety, I’m hoping it’s good for my ADHD too. I feel like I am becoming more present in my irl life.
Reading
I’ve been swapping my phone time for reading, and have read some things I’ve really enjoyed
brother.do.you.love.me is a frank non-fiction memoir, detailing a period in the life of brothers Reuben and Manni Coe. Reuben, who has Down’s Syndrome, struggled with loneliness in a care home during 2020. Manni, his older brother, was struggling with the separation and guilt in Spain. After an S.O.S. text, Manni uprooted his life to reunite with his brother. The story is slow, when we first meet Reuben he is non-verbal. It is a lovely story of sibling bonds and how we all improve each others lives.
Greta & Valdin is a novel about a pair of eccentric queer siblings, so felt like it was written just for me. At first I found it slightly disorienting, we enter the book mid-action and there are many, many side characters. Once I found my footing, I found this portrait refreshing and really enjoyable. I felt such affection for the family, not wanting the book to end.
I’m currently reading Come & Get It by Kiley Reid. I read her first novel, Such A Fun Age, in 2020 and was struck by her ability to write with humour and nuance about racism, privilege and ‘wokeness’. Come & Get It revolves around one of my favourite topics: people’s relationships with money. The book rotates between 3 perspectives, increasingly intertwined. I’m looking forward to seeing what happens!
Challengers
The film drops us into a ‘challenger’, a low level professional tennis match, just outside New York. Gradually, masterfully, the context is unfolded before us.
The film centres on a love triangle between Zendaya, a Serena Williams-esque tennis protégé turned overzealous coach, and two boarding school mates turned estranged rivals. We see vignettes of this trio, with and without each other, from the events leading up to this match, ten years in the making. As the techno score soars, the professional & personal stakes couldn’t be higher.
I saw Challengers in the cinema, and it slowly infiltrated my brain, the tweet below summarised it perfectly. I have been referring to myself a a ‘Challengers head’, I don’t even really know what that would mean. Just that all films I watch now relate to Challengers.
This film just gave me exactly what I wanted from it, chiefly: a love triangle where all of the corners touch. I know that some people felt the relationship between the two men wasn’t - sexually, romantically - explicit enough, for me it deepened its effect. Luca Guadagnino’s subtlety in directing felt like he really trusted the audience, allowing the film to open up in front of us. If you can catch it whilst it’s still in cinemas, I would recommend it!
I can’t talk about anything without thinking about the atrocities happening in Palestine. I am going to be donating money, keeping talking, keeping boycotting, and I’d encourage you to do the same.